Brothers in Traffic
You are driving down a winding mountain road, enjoying the scenery. Suddenly you notice in your rearview mirror a car coming up rapidly behind you. The driver is weaving wildly, honking his horn and attempting to pass you on dangerous curves. Dismayed and angry, you try to avoid being run off the road. Finally, the motorist darts past you on a blind curve and zooms on ahead.
“Jerk,” you mutter–or worse–and keep on driving at your previous sane pace.
A couple of miles further on, you round a turn to see the crazy driver has run off the road and crashed into a tree. Because you are a good person, you grudgingly stop to see if he requires assistance. As you approach, the driver appears to be okay: you can see him sitting up straight in his seat, then opening the door to get out. At this point you feel free to give him a piece of your mind.
As you begin your “serves you right” speech, the man turns to look at you. It is your brother.
Suddenly the situation is completely different. This is no longer an unknown human, one defined only by his unsafe driving habits whom you can easily label a jerk (or worse). Now, you might not like your brother, and maybe you would still launch into the “serves you right” speech. But you suddenly must relate to him in a different way.
Why is that humans enjoy judging others based on the narrowest of experiences? And why do we act differently to people just because we know them–even vaguely? Let’s say you’re in a traffic jam, and some guy wants to cut in front of you. You’re about to offer a rude gesture to him (or at least prevent him from edging ahead of you), but then you notice it’s your next door neighbour. What do you do?
You let him in, don’t you? Might even smile. And that hand that was about to offer the hostile gesture now waves him on ahead. And that’s even if you don’t have a particularly close relationship with your neighbour. You can substitute many other types: your child’s science teacher, the clerk you always see at 7-Eleven. Pretty much anyone with whom you have developed a nodding acquaintance.
But for a complete stranger? That person can be classified, instantly stereotyped and reviled or reduced to a simple characterization. Conflicts can grow when we are put in situations with strangers whom we actually know nothing about: their background, family lives or even their intentions. Yes, there are real dangers out there, and reasonable precautions that must be taken in certain situations. But I’m talking about the reflexive tendency to draw negative conclusions about an individual based on the most fleeting of experience–and our preference to instantly pass negative judgements on others. Conversely, we are often willing to accommodate other people with whom we have only the slightest acquaintance.
We don’t know the situation of the man in the car. Perhaps he was in a frantic hurry to reach a hospital after learning that his wife was suddenly critically ill. Perhaps he could use your help. Perhaps he really is a jerk. He is also your brother. Or to use the relevant language in the Bible, he is your “neighbour.” One time an “expert in the Law” quizzed Jesus about the definition of “neighbour.” Jesus agreed with this man’s statement that the two greatest commandments are to:
“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, ‘Love your neighbour as yourself.”
So far, so good, but in the story, the legal expert couldn’t stop there. He then asked “And who is my neighbour?”
30 In reply Jesus said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. 31 A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. 32 So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. 33 But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. 34 He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. 35 The next day he took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’
Jesus asked the expert “Which of these three do you think was a neighbour to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”
The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”
Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”
You are prudent if you carefully assess the scene after you find the reckless driver crashed into a tree. But can you love him? Or do we prefer to judge strangers, foreigners and outsiders?
Luke 10: 29-35
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