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Life IS a dress rehearsal

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29 Jun 2025

NASCAR and the Ten Commandments

My mother attended a small church in South Carolina, where the Sunday service began promptly at 11 a.m. and ended precisely an hour later. If the pastor was overwhelmed by the Spirit and his sermon began to run long, parishioners would fidget in their seats and glance at their watches. They joked that they loved the Lord, but they loved NASCAR, too, and they needed to get home, have lunch and get settled in front of the tube to watch the races.

NASCAR races are typically run on Sundays, and are most often held in states that contain a large proportion of Bible-believing folks. Texas, for example, hosts a stop on the NASCAR circuit and recently passed a law requiring that every public school classroom must display the Ten Commandments. The law is set to take effect in the coming school year.

The Ten Commandments are viewed as the bedrock of Judeo-Christian values. It’s easy even for non-Christians to get behind most of the commands: don’t murder, don’t steal. Even “honour your father and mother” seems like a healthy concept. No doubt legislators in Texas, Louisiana and other states that are preparing similar laws are committed to ensuring that the precepts contained in the Commandments are impressed on the youth of the nation. As Moses, who brought the Commandments down from Mt. Sinai, told the Israelites, “These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children.”

Christians believe that their salvation comes from grace, not from the Law. The Jews had 613 clear commandments in the Old Testament that prescribed correct behavior and clearly defined unacceptable acts. Jesus didn’t abolish all those laws or say that they no longer mattered. But modern Christians don’t feel obligated to follow ancient laws regarding unclean food, how to deal with mildew or the correct way to sacrifice a goat. Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross and New Testament teaching show that belief in Christ’s atoning death is essential–not a series of laws.

So what do we do with those Ten Commandments? They are a prescription for ideal moral behavior, except for maybe a couple of items that seem a bit out of place in the 21st century. One is the prohibition on making graven images. This was important to the Israelites 3,000 years ago, when they were surrounded by other religions that fashioned their gods out of wood and stone. The other confounding commandment pertains to the Sabbath. That’s the 7th day of the week, a day of rest. The Lord was very clear on its importance. Indeed, in Exodus 35:2 Moses says “Whoever does any work on it is to be put to death.” Serious stuff.

So what are the children in Texas or Louisiana or Arkansas to make of this? Stores everywhere are open on Sundays, millions of Americans work on the seventh day of the week. Moses told his people that they couldn’t even light a fire in their homes on the Sabbath. And yet, in May the Texas House of Representatives passed the Ten Commandments bill on the Jewish Sabbath. Maybe that didn’t count, since most of them were Christians and honor the Lord on Sundays. Sunday is also the day that the Texas Motor Speedway held the NASCAR cup series. But nowhere in America is it described as a mandatory day of rest. It might be the day when most Christians go to church, but a lot of them go to work on that day.

Do we get to choose which of the Commandments we follow? Just the most obvious ones, like not murdering someone? How exactly do we honor our parents? And what about “misusing the name of the Lord?”–or what the King James Version of the Bible referred to as ‘taking the Lord’s name in vain’. In recent decades that commandment has primarily been interpreted merely as a ban on swearing, as opposed to a to a mandate to respect and revere the Lord. If the Ten Commandments are so important that they should be placed in a fourth grade classroom, shouldn’t the people who advocate this also abide by them? At the very least, they might want to go a little beyond the pious action of posting a Biblical treatise on the wall and devote time to exploring what is really meant when the Lord says “you should have no other gods before me.”

Jesus reserved his most pointed criticism for the Pharisees, who were the religious leaders of his day, the people who told others how to act and judged their behavior. The Pharisees believed that laws equalled piety. They were all about the rules. They were wrong.

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27 Apr 2025

Tech Tyranny

“The central problem of the modern world is the complete emancipation and autonomy of the technological mind at a time when unlimited possibilities lie open to it and all the resources seem to be at hand.”

That observation was made 60 years ago by Thomas Merton, the Trappist monk and author. He was appalled by the mindless embrace of technology in the name of “progress”. “The consequence of this,” he goes on to say, “is that technology and science are now responsible to no power and submit to no control other than their own.”

While modern societies can congratulate themselves on the fact that the nuclear armageddon that activists like Merton feared in the 60’s has so far been avoided, they have surrendered to other technological developments with a mixture of fascination and indifference. Six decades on, technology is even less responsible to control–indeed, the unchecked ascent of AI, social media and cryptocurrency have been accepted uncritically by most authorities and the public in general. To quote Merton again: “Needless to say, the demands of ethics no longer have any meaning if they come into conflict with these autonomous powers. Technology has its own ethic of expediency and efficiency.”

Thus we have billionaires and Silicon Valley wizards unveiling their plans to accomplish everything from colonizing Mars to inserting AI in everything from your car to your brain: all because it’s possible and they think it’s a good idea (and probably very profitable). The good monk of Kentucky would be appalled. Back in what we would consider very low-tech times, Merton warned “The effect of a totally emancipated technology is the regression of man to a climate of moral infancy, in total dependence not on ‘Mother Nature’ but on the pseudonature of technology, which has replaced nature by a closed system of mechanisms with no purpose but that of keeping themselves going.” The science journalist Adam Becker calls this “the ideology of technological salvation,” criticizing the tech industry’s twin goals of perpetual growth and “transcendence — the promise of an imagined end that justifies blowing through any actual limits, including conventional morality.”

Merton was right 60 years ago: “if technology remained in the service of what is higher than itself–reason, man, God–it might indeed fulfil some of the functions that are now mythically attributed to it. But becoming autonomous, existing only for itself, it imposes upon man its own irrational demands, and threatens to destroy him. Let us hope it is not too late for man to regain control.”

That was in 1965. In 2025 Becker echoes Merton’s accusation. “The credence that tech billionaires give to these specific science-fictional futures validates their pursuit of more — to portray the growth of their businesses as a moral imperative, to reduce the complex problems of the world to simple questions of technology, to justify nearly any action they might want to take — all in the name of saving humanity from a threat that doesn’t exist, aiming at a utopia that will never come.”

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29 Jan 2025

A Successful Life

When I was 10 years old I wanted to be the governor of Maryland. This might seem like an unusual goal for a boy from Los Angeles, but my mother had recently taken my sister and me to visit relatives on the Eastern Shore of Maryland, and I was enchanted by the area. When I shared my plan with my mother, she agreed it was a worthy ambition.

I asked her if she had ever wanted to do big things or be somebody important. She smiled and said no, she was happy with who she was. I was disappointed, and a bit incredulous. I couldn’t understand how someone would choose a mundane life completely lacking in ambition. As the years passed, my dream of being Maryland’s governor was replaced by other objectives, but the ambition did not abate. I wanted to succeed, accomplish things and reach the pinnacle of my profession. However, as I grew older, I began to see the value of my mother’s perspective. The things she valued–love, family, compassion and service–seemed more valid and enduring than personal achievements. Over time, my disdain for a life lacking in personal ambition transformed into appreciation for a way of life marked by humility and sacrifice.

It’s easy to forget what’s most important when your ego gets in the way. Jesus’s disciples were guilty of it–arguing which of them would be greatest. Jesus quickly set the record straight. “Whoever desires to become great among you, let him be your servant.” My mother never desired to be great, but she expressed the qualities that are most essential for an effective and praiseworthy life. She was a humble servant, a caring friend and a supportive parent. I wish that 10-year-old boy had learned that lesson earlier, but he recognises it now.

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17 Aug 2024

The eagle hunters of Western Mongolia

Last year my wife and I traveled to a remote area of Mongolia to witness one of the most unique spectacles on the planet.

Here is a link to the story I wrote for the online travel publication Thrillist that shares a bit of the experience.

https://www.thrillist.com/travel/nation/eagle-hunter-festivals-western-mongolia

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18 Apr 2024

A Life’s Worth

A LIFE’S WORTH

My mother is 93 years old. She is cheerful, content and comfortable. Dementia has robbed her of the ability to remember what she had for lunch, the names of my children or what I do for a living. We have conversations where she might ask the same question several times. She won’t remember the answer and I’ll hear the question again during our next call. Eventually, soon, she won’t remember me.

Her caregivers adore my mother. They take the time to chat with her because she is gentle, amiable and has a pretty good sense of humor. Taking care of her is not challenging for them, although Mother is weak and requires assistance to meet her basic needs.

For the past several years my job has involved providing care for children with severe disabilities. Few of them will ever be able to live independently; many have both intellectual and physical disabilities. One of the children, Feiguo, spends his day in bed, his body severely constrained by cerebral palsy. Feiguo has the brightest, most contagious smile I have ever seen. His caregivers adore him. They linger by his bedside, stroking his head and chatting, even though Feiguo is not capable of verbalizing words anymore. Taking care of him is not challenging for them, although he can barely move and requires assistance to meet his basic needs.

In a world where people are judged by their abilities and accomplishments, what is the value of those who possess few abilities and don’t accomplish anything? Those who are fading from life and those who never really had a chance? It is costly to provide services to these people: an investment with no quantifiable return. In China, where Feiguo lives, citizens are exhorted to contribute to the greater good and the race for prosperity motivates millions. In the United States, where my mother lives, youth is celebrated, along with success. Both societies recognize and accept the fact that people like Feiguo and my mother must be cared for. Often this is seen as more of an obligation than an opportunity.

The word ‘care’ has two entwined meanings. One refers to an action and implies that the recipient requires someone to look after them and meet their needs. The other is an emotion. It is a response, not a judgement. When we measure people by their productivity or their ability to function in society, people with severe disabilities can be viewed the way banks view non-performing loans: not as an asset, but a net loss.   

Are the elderly people sequestered in an “assisted living home” contributing anything? Do severely disabled children have value? If the metric you use to answer these questions is based on their ability to love and be loved, then I claim they have at least as much value as selfish strivers in either society who don’t value the act of caring. The worth of a young man confined to a bed, yet smiling serenely at those who see him each day, is not based on what he can do. His value was established when he was born. My mother’s worth is not based on what she was able to accomplish in the first 90 years of her life. Like all of us, her worth comes from the fact that, as a human being, she is capable of loving and being loved, and her dignity as a person is not reduced because she can’t remember where I live.

She is contributing. Feiguo’s life is valuable. A life’s worth is already innate in each person. Their ability to love—to care—is the ultimate expression of that pre-installed value. But the value is not diminished by physical or mental obstacles. Just ask the people who care.  

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14 Mar 2024

Brothers in Traffic

You are driving down a winding mountain road, enjoying the scenery. Suddenly you notice in your rearview mirror a car coming up rapidly behind you. The driver is weaving wildly, honking his horn and attempting to pass you on dangerous curves. Dismayed and angry, you try to avoid being run off the road. Finally, the motorist darts past you on a blind curve and zooms on ahead.

“Jerk,” you mutter–or worse–and keep on driving at your previous sane pace.

A couple of miles further on, you round a turn to see the crazy driver has run off the road and crashed into a tree. Because you are a good person, you grudgingly stop to see if he requires assistance. As you approach, the driver appears to be okay: you can see him sitting up straight in his seat, then opening the door to get out. At this point you feel free to give him a piece of your mind.

As you begin your “serves you right” speech, the man turns to look at you. It is your brother.

Suddenly the situation is completely different. This is no longer an unknown human, one defined only by his unsafe driving habits whom you can easily label a jerk (or worse). Now, you might not like your brother, and maybe you would still launch into the “serves you right” speech. But you suddenly must relate to him in a different way.

Why is that humans enjoy judging others based on the narrowest of experiences? And why do we act differently to people just because we know them–even vaguely? Let’s say you’re in a traffic jam, and some guy wants to cut in front of you. You’re about to offer a rude gesture to him (or at least prevent him from edging ahead of you), but then you notice it’s your next door neighbour. What do you do?

You let him in, don’t you? Might even smile. And that hand that was about to offer the hostile gesture now waves him on ahead. And that’s even if you don’t have a particularly close relationship with your neighbour. You can substitute many other types: your child’s science teacher, the clerk you always see at 7-Eleven. Pretty much anyone with whom you have developed a nodding acquaintance.

But for a complete stranger? That person can be classified, instantly stereotyped and reviled or reduced to a simple characterization. Conflicts can grow when we are put in situations with strangers whom we actually know nothing about: their background, family lives or even their intentions. Yes, there are real dangers out there, and reasonable precautions that must be taken in certain situations. But I’m talking about the reflexive tendency to draw negative conclusions about an individual based on the most fleeting of experience–and our preference to instantly pass negative judgements on others. Conversely, we are often willing to accommodate other people with whom we have only the slightest acquaintance.

We don’t know the situation of the man in the car. Perhaps he was in a frantic hurry to reach a hospital after learning that his wife was suddenly critically ill. Perhaps he could use your help. Perhaps he really is a jerk. He is also your brother. Or to use the relevant language in the Bible, he is your “neighbour.” One time an “expert in the Law” quizzed Jesus about the definition of “neighbour.” Jesus agreed with this man’s statement that the two greatest commandments are to:

“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, ‘Love your neighbour as yourself.”

So far, so good, but in the story, the legal expert couldn’t stop there. He then asked “And who is my neighbour?”

30 In reply Jesus said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. 31 A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. 32 So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. 33 But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. 34 He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. 35 The next day he took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’ 

 Jesus asked the expert “Which of these three do you think was a neighbour to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”

The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”

Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”

You are prudent if you carefully assess the scene after you find the reckless driver crashed into a tree. But can you love him? Or do we prefer to judge strangers, foreigners and outsiders?

Luke 10: 29-35

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27 Feb 2024

Writing again

For the past 7 years I haven’t posted anything on this blog. During that time I was working for a non-profit organisation that served children with disabilities in China. As I return to writing, so much has changed. Hong Kong, my home for the past three decades, has been transformed from a freewheeling, open society into one where the government is obsessed with security and the people must be careful of what they say.

I am not sure whether the words I write will get me in trouble. Perhaps the thoughts I think aren’t acceptable.

I will continue to write, now that I have the time and the inclination. I believe it is my right to do so.

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10 Feb 2024

Isn’t This Shocking

Isn’t this shocking.

An active shooter at the mall

at the school

       down the street.

Multiple fatalities they say. Terrible

Busy day tomorrow got to remember to go by the bank

What did the TV say?

   How awful what’s for dinner?

   This has to stop so many people dying unsafe cities

It could happen here I need to remember to send that email.

Including a young girl how terrible

     What is the world coming to?

Have you seen that new reality show the one about the dating people…

One man in custody but no known motive

And the ambulances, the news is filled with them and the crying

    Mothers don’t know why

       don’t understand

And this is the second time this month

Let’s get take out tonight change the channel

Isn’t this shocking

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20 Feb 2017

Letting go

A friend of mine described a recent situation where his four-year-old daughter came to him in tears, clutching a broken toy. He could see what the problem was, and held out his hand to take the toy and fix it. She wouldn’t let go, but continued crying and complaining that her toy was broken.

“Give it to me, honey. I can fix it.”

The girl just cried harder, focused only on her own misery. She wouldn’t let go and allow her father to handle the problem.

I can relate–not to the parent, but to the child.

 

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16 Jan 2017

Sunsets, talking snowmen and the rest of the universe

When I was a boy, we would spend summers at my grandmother’s house in Maryland. She lived on a river that fed the Chesapeake Bay. There were hidden coves and winding inlets that I could explore in a motorboat, and I spent hours on the river pretending I was a pirate or a commando or an explorer.

But some afternoons I preferred to sit at my grandmother’s typewriter and work on a story that I had thought up: it was about Super Pupil, a grade school superhero whose sidekick was a dog. I sent them on humorous adventures and enjoyed tapping out little stories painstakingly on the typewriter.

My grandmother was perplexed that a 10-year-old boy would want to sit inside writing instead of being outside playing. The best explanation that I could offer was that I liked to write. My early attempts at literature featured talking snowmen and goofy storylines, so it wasn’t as if I was motivated by a need to enlighten an audience. I just liked to write.

My family didn’t view my unusual hobby as the first steps toward a literary future. When my grandmother read the typewritten pages that I proudly but shyly offered her (my first reader!), she chuckled. Success! But then her comment revealed the source of her amusement.

“These typos are precious!” she laughed.

Rejection, misunderstanding and valid criticism are inevitable components of a writer’s life. Even as a journalist I was offended by the heavy-handed and arbitrary (I thought) edits of a news director. And those were just news stories: factual and straightforward. Sure, I tried to make them interesting. But the subject of those stories came from crime scenes, political conflicts or natural disasters–not my own head, and my own heart.

These days, although I can still agree with the 10-year-old and say that I like to write, there is something else that motivates me. This is true with most writers. They have to write. It is as if there is something taking place in the universe that needs to be revealed. Usually the revelation is a small one: just a glimpse of life that other people can relate to. Sometimes it’s an insight. Only occasionally is it a profound truth. We risk disapproval, disappointment and disdain in order to publish the slimmest of stories.

But even mediocre writing (been there, done that) is a reflection of a story that is constantly unfolding and needs to be told. How many sunset pictures does the world need? There’s another one every day. Some are gorgeous; most are just “nice”. But we watch the sunset and take photos, too. We participate in the event. If the sunset is particularly memorable, we share the photos with friends.

Do we have to take pictures of a sunset? Do we have to share a moment or an insight or a small reflection of the wonder and turbulence of the universe? Yes, we do.

 

 

 

 

 

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